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MY BEST EVER FRUIT CAKE

 

You are bound to want to serve this fantastic Fruit Cake recipe for all of your Birthday, Wedding or Christmas party gatherings!!

 

…..Hic Hic Hic !!

 It is SOooo very much better than store-bought

Ingredients

1-cup water
1-cup sugar
4 large eggs
2 cups dried fruit
1-teaspoon baking soda
1-teaspoon salt
 1-cup brown sugar
Large splash of lemon juice
Handfuls of nuts
1-gallon whiskey

METHOD

Sample the whiskey to check for quality.
Take a large bowl.  Check the whiskey again to be sure it is of the highest quality.
Pour one level cup and drink.

REPEAT The Above

NEXT
Turn on the electric mixer; beat 1-cup butter in a large, fluffy bowl.
Add 1-teaspoon sugar and beat again.
Make sure the whiskey is still OK.
Cry another tup.
Turn off mixer.
Break 2 legs and add to the bowl and chuck in the cup of dried fruit.
Mix on the turner.
If the fried druit gets stuck in the beaterers, pry it loose with a drewscriver.
Sample the whiskey to check for tonsisticity.
Next, sift 2 cups of salt. Or something. Who cares?

CHECK THE WHISKY

Yeth – I Thaid Cheek the Whiskey Bootle Again. You Thilly Thausage

Now sift the lemon juice and strain your nuts.
Add one table. Spoon. Of sugar or something. Whatever you can find.
Grease the oven.
Turn the cake tin to 350 degrees.
Don't forget to beat off the turner.
Throw the bowl out of the window.
Check the whiskey again.

 Who the hell likes Flutt Kakkey anyways? Hic Hic !

Let’s get shot At SwhiskeyS Bar………..

OR………..  Maybe Go to Bed And Try Again Tomorrow!! hey, you cumin’ or what………………???