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Dampers by Keith Garvey
Knew a bloke once called Damper Dan	Bore-drain water and weevily flour
Remember the bludger well I can	Welded into a mixture sour
And his dampers	For damper
Bottomless moleskins hangin' slack	Stick to yer ribs and clog yer pipes
Tin of treacle, sticky and black,	Give the goes as well as the gripes
Heap of flour in a dirty sack	And he'd say, 'She's a lovely feed, by cripes
For dampers	Bonzer damper'
*	*
Always camped by a bore-drains flow	Beef or mutton he wouldn't touch
Whiskery and greasy and foul and low	Brownie or cake he didn't like much
Eatin' dampers	Only damper
Never would buy a loaf of bread	'Nothin' he'd say, 'like good clean flour
'Too bloody dear' he always said	Never gets stale or mouldy or sour
Cooked every day like lumps of lead	Nothin' gives yer muscular power
Heavy dampers	Like damper'
*	*
Down he'd sit with a toothless grin	Follered his funeral without regret
Mixin' the dough in a gallon tin	Went where there's plenty of heat, I'll bet
For dampers	For dampers
Over his bulgin' bottom lip	And it's safe to bet the devil could tell
Nicotine and slobber would slip	How he sits all day by the hearth of hell
Run down his pipe and slowly drip	With his sack of flour and his evil smell
In the damper	Cookin' dampers.....Soddy bloody dampers